More Fruit and Veg

      No Comments on More Fruit and Veg

This past summer, I wrote a piece about political correctness where fruits and vegetables are concerned. It was based on a fictitious future (circa 2032) news item about scientists having discovered that fruit and veg can understand human languages. This led fruit and veggie advocates to inform the world that expressions such as “red as a beetroot”, “blow a raspberry”… Read more »

Poppies and Tinsel II

      No Comments on Poppies and Tinsel II

Now that the Poppies Are Gone… It’s November the twelfth, and yesterday I was laying a wreath on behalf of the First Okotoks Scout Group. Several hundred people attended this outdoor ceremony at the cenotaph, where the bright sunshine was making the hoar frost sparkle on the trees. It’s a setting that I much prefer to the indoor ceremony, for… Read more »

Teaching a New Dog Old Tricks

      1 Comment on Teaching a New Dog Old Tricks

News headline: Sheepdog puppy led a herd of sheep into his owners’ home To paraphrase the UB40 song from 1986— “There’s a sheep in mi kitchen, what am I gonna do?”… What would you do if you found nine sheep in your kitchen? Fall asleep as you counted them? Threaten them with the mint sauce jar? Tell them to get… Read more »

Fishy Flatulence

      No Comments on Fishy Flatulence

It’s been discovered that herrings pass gas. While congregated in great shoals. The news isn’t new—in fact the background studies were done in the early 2000s—but my attention was drawn to it by a “Fact or Crap” page-a-day calendar (on September 21 to be precise). Where do I start? The pitch? The communal nature? The interpretation? So many facets—so little… Read more »

Living on the Edge

      No Comments on Living on the Edge

Headline: “Roadkill deaths driving some species to the edge” The animals of Nickeldime Wood had convened at the Old Lightning Tree for what in less politically-sensitive times would have been referred to colloquially as a pow wow. Friend and foe, and predator and prey were all gathered there. Such meetings were rare, but if one thing was guaranteed to bring… Read more »

Calling a Spade a Shovel

      No Comments on Calling a Spade a Shovel

The art of digging is dying. No, I’m not looking for a gravedigging pun here. (Actually, I did look, but couldn’t find one.) Long considered men’s work, most men could handle a spade and a shovel quite well even if they didn’t labour for a living, because so many families grew their own vegetables. Many women would have become expert… Read more »

What’s a “Transistor Radio”?

The UK radio station that was “born” on Mrs. H’s 14th birthday turned 50 this weekend (Sept 30 to be precise). (Please don’t do the arithmetic—Mrs. H. won’t thank you for it!) For many people who grew up with BBC Radio 1 in the 60s and 70s, this is a big(ish) deal, and in acknowledgement of that, the BBC had… Read more »

Typewriter or Lathe

      1 Comment on Typewriter or Lathe

Are you a typewriter eater or a lathe eater? Here’s another question. Are you a hater or a lover of articles that attempt to pigeon-hole you? Whatever… read on. Here in southern Alberta, Taber corn is much sought-after, for some reason. Whenever we see a sign for Taber corn, we flock like bees to a honeypot or flies to… well,… Read more »

Sunflowers on the Beach

      1 Comment on Sunflowers on the Beach

Interesting fact: Sunflowers turn to face the sun in order to maximize photosynthesis and to encourage the insects that are necessary for pollination to occur. Mature sunflowers that have been pollinated no longer follow the sun. Scene: a bar in a sun-kissed holiday resort. Mick and Rick, two forty-something guys, are people watching as they sip at their refreshing mid-morning… Read more »