(~1 minutes to read)
Question. What do you do with a dead feral cat?
The answer depends on a number of factors, such as “Apart from being dead, is it in good shape?” (quite literally!) and “What talents and skills do you possess that are compatible with disposal of a dead cat?”
If you’re a taxidermist, I guess you’d stuff and mount it (no, not that kind of mount!). If you were a biology teacher, perhaps you’d take it to school as a novelty for your year/grade 8 or 9 pupils/students.
And if you were an artist, you might look for a way to accessorize using it.
In Blackadder III, Edmund has a robe made for what he thought was the beginning of a political career; it should have been made of ermine, but Mrs. Miggins spotted the truth—it was finest cat fur.
And a 2005 blog post I found shows how to make a dead cat bag from black felt and red fleece—not the real McCoy, but it shows the direction we’re headed.
This week, the CBC reported that a New Zealand artist and taxidermist had made a handbag (they’re called purses in Canada) from a dead ginger tomcat she found by the side of a country road. The bag looks kind of spooky because it includes the cat’s head, with eyes open and staring. Apparently she kept the cat in her freezer (sounds like a sketchy restaurant I went to a couple of times a long time ago…) for three months while she looked for the owner, then used her taxidermic/artistic skills to design and create the handbag.
Strangely, the New Zealand Herald hasn’t run the story (as far as I can tell)—perhaps for Kiwis the concept is commonplace.
If the artist has a tech-savvy buddy (or are they “mates” in NZ?), maybe she could arrange for the purse to purr when she strokes it and hiss when someone tries to steal it. A worthwhile enhancement in this wearable technology age, I think.
I’m sure that crazy cat ladies around the world are thinking this is the purrrfect purrrrse for them, and are planning how to emulate the accessory when one of their kitties passes away.
And there’s just a faint possibility that I’ve hit on the truth of Donald’s hairstyle.