Time to Update Our Derogatory Terms?

(~9 minutes to read)

When a person is engaged in creative writing, one of the innumerable points he has to consider is how his characters would convey their disapproval of people. Are the characters high-society types or mere mortals? Are they conservative or colloquial in their speech? Do they express their opinions carefully or forcefully? And so on.

You Barsteward…

My mental meanderings on the subject started with “bastard”. The word is (or used to be) a legal term applied to children whose biological parents weren’t married. Definitions vary (varied) slightly from jurisdiction to jurisdiction as to the timing of the labelling – i.e. as to whether or not the parents were married at the date of conception vs. birth – but for the sake of simplicity, let’s say that a “bastard” was a child born out of wedlock.

Life could be made awkward for bastards. Inheritance of estate was difficult if not impossible, and hereditary titles could not pass to bastards. Worst of all (horror!), a bastard could not become a bishop in the church.

In most jurisdictions, illegitimacy is no longer a legal disability. And birth-outside-marriage rates have increased drastically in the last fifty years, so in large sections of society there’s no longer any stigma associated with illegitimacy. Therefore, outside of period pieces, an author would be unlikely to have one character insult another by doubting their parentage.

By and large, “bastard” is now only a term for “an unpleasant or despicable person”, and additionally in the UK, “a person of a specified kind”, such as a “jammy bastard” or an “ugly bastard” (gotta love those Brits!). Monty Python’s Life of Brian uses the term in a number of places, including here (at 00:34), here and here (at 03:57).

But as a pejorative, it’s lost its sting, so I’d like to suggest the adoption of the word “dastard” in its place. It’s almost as old a word, its origins are intermingled with “bastard”, and it can be said with almost as much gusto (although the “d” isn’t quite as dramatic as the “b” plosive!)

According to the online Oxford Dictionary, “dastard” means almost the same as “bastard”, but without that whole illegitimacy complication, which helps in the ongoing PC wars:

• bastard – an unpleasant or despicable person
• dastard – a dishonourable or despicable man

Other dictionaries’ definitions aren’t quite so neatly and conveniently aligned, so I won’t weaken my argument by citing them here!

If Wacky Races can use the word in the name of one of its characters (Dick Dastardly), then I’m sure we can get the word back into mainstream use. (What’s that, you say? “Wacky Races is getting on for fifty years old!”? Okay – we may have to work a little harder at reviving the word!)

Why “dastard” is specific to males, I don’t know, but if my next word topic can apply to both sexes, then I’m sure “dastard” can be too.

Life’s a…

For some reason, the word “bitch” seems to be a much bigger deal in the US than it is in the UK. And as in many matters, Canada is somewhere in between.

With the exception of some sub-cultures (such as those that surround certain musical genres and biking) and when referring to females of canine species, this epithet has never actually been benign. It’s the degree of reaction that the word elicits, however, that highlights the trans-Atlantic difference.

Apparently, in the 1939 movie The Women, Joan Crawford could only allude to the word: “And by the way, there’s a name for you ladies, but it isn’t used in high society – outside of a kennel.”

Elton John had a huge hit in 1974 with “The Bitch is Back” – the word appears at least eighteen times (excluding the repeated last line). Some radio stations in the US and elsewhere refused to play it. Even today, at least one of the song lyrics websites (metrolyrics) advises that there is “explicit language” in the lyrics – the only word that that advisory could refer to is “bitch”.

The interesting thing is that Elton John is referring to himself in the lyrics. (“I’m a bitch, I’m a bitch, oh the bitch is back”). He is, undeniably, male, so it seems that the word has become androgynous. This adds weight to my argument for the adoption of “dastard” above.

The word has become as general-purpose as “bastard” though, and like that word, has lost much of its shock value. As for retiring it as an offensive word in favour of some other term – I don’t know. I like the word for its utility, but my OCD demands that its acceptable meanings be separated from the ones that genuinely do give offence (for example, if a person is using the word as a synonym for prostitute or whoreson.) Unfortunately, I haven’t found a suitable alternative, and following the “bastard/dastard” model isn’t an option; “ditch” just doesn’t say what you want to say like the “b” word does!

The “C” Word

This is one word that still shocks me so much that I can’t write it here. When we left the UK in 1994, it still shocked a lot of people, but judging from the limited amount of British TV that Mrs. H. and I watch these days (via Netflix and iTunes, mostly), the word has crept into slightly more general use.

As a youth in the east end of London, I suspect I used the word (shame on me!) Lots of people unwittingly use the word by proxy when they call someone a “berk” – cockney rhyming slang for “that word” (the full reference being “Berkley Hunt” or “Berkshire Hunt”). This, despite the fact that both Berkley and Berkshire are pronounced as if spelt “bark…”

If I had my way, the word would continue to be completely taboo, and writing-wise, I’d satisfy myself with the occasional “berk” uttered from the mouth of a character with British origins.

Prince of Wales

At the other end of the spectrum there are derogatory terms that never really caught on. One that I used at high school was “you mollusc!” I have no idea where I picked it up, but I haven’t heard it used as an insult for decades – probably since shortly after I left school. But there are more famous examples.

Take “You Prince of Wales!” for example. I’ve seen it quoted in books of insults, and have heard one or two people use it to show off their knowledge of Shakespeare, but never have I heard it used “in anger”. I have to confess to being in the “I hate Shakespeare!” camp, and have only ever studied two of his plays (mandatory texts at high school), so I’ve had to rely on notes in the interweb to help me decipher Falstaff’s rant at Henry, Prince of Wales. One site put a comma between “you” and “Prince”, and interpreted it in modern English as, “You – Prince of Wales? What a joke!” My copy of Shakespeare’s works (printed in or before 1935) doesn’t have that comma, and therefore maintains the likelihood that “Prince of Wales” was indeed meant as an insult.

While I freely admit to being a monarchist, I have to say that based on a good deal of the evidence of the last couple of hundred years, perhaps Shakespeare was on to something.

Prince George (much satirized in Blackadder III), who later became George IV, was, apparently, selfish, unreliable and irresponsible, and had such a poor relationship with his wife (it was a marriage greatly encouraged by his father) that they were formally separated within a year or so. He had a string of mistresses and, some believe, sired at least five illegitimate children.

The future Edward VII was Prince of Wales for over 59 years. He was very much the playboy, and his infamous “siege d’amour” speaks volumes about his lifestyle – he also had mistresses throughout his marriage. Paradoxically, it was he that was credited with modernizing the public image of the Royal Family.

The Duke of Windsor was Prince of Wales from June 1911 to January 1936, at which time he acceded to the throne as Edward VIII. Although a popular royal, his womanising and reckless behaviour worried both his father and the Prime Minister. He abdicated in order to marry a twice-divorced American. Although I personally think he acted honourably in that matter, many have judged him harshly.

And so to our current Prince of Wales. Until his marriage to Camilla Parker Bowles, I was ambivalent about his being heir to the throne. Now, I count myself among those who hope that he cedes his place as first in line to his elder son, William. I’m no puritan (or maybe I am), but I might find it difficult to respect him as His Majesty Charles the Third (or George the Seventh), by the Grace of God of the United Kingdom, Canada and His other Realms and Territories King, Head of the Commonwealth, Defender of the Faith.

Perhaps we’ve been spoiled by QEII (the lady, not the ship or highway or bridge, or…), the only monarch most of her subjects have ever known. Her reputation is, as far as I know, totally unblemished. Admittedly, she wasn’t heir to the throne for decades like the above PoWs were, but I like to believe that she would have led an unblemished life anyway.

You’re a Natural!

Perhaps my favourite insult is the word “natural”, because many people don’t realize that it can be used as one – in fact, it’s more often than not used as a compliment.

Although the meanings are now archaic, “natural” can mean “illegitimate” (aka “bastard”) or “mentally deficient from birth”. It’s politically incorrect to use any reference to mental deficiency as a form of insult, but then it’s politically incorrect to use any reference to social disadvantage as a form of insult, so “natural” should be as acceptable (or unacceptable) as “bastard”, in my opinion.

What Does All This Mean?

Good question!

In everyday conversation, probably very little. People will continue using their pejoratives of choice until either the weight of social opinion forces them to change or a more apropos or catchy alternative comes along.

In creative writing though, the author or playwright must continue to be tuned in to the nuances of the various words, and use them appropriately, according to the traits that they’re writing into their characters. And if tastes change, they must make a decision to either revise their work or realize that it will be shunned.

And frankly, that’s a bastard of a prospect.

Your Turn

What’s your take on derogatory terms? Which ones do you use in conversation? Do you as a writer pay close attention to the match between the term and the character who uses it? Let me know by leaving a comment.